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  1. 12 likes
    I never saw that page before. How is it that Eric is so far down the board that I am ahead of him? If I can get 2 more likes I can get past Elrod. Not like I am begging or anything...... Tom Newark, CA (Soon to be Modesto CA)
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    Here is picture of yesterday's sunset, hope you enjoy it friends. MAS
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    I am sure that I made the "Honorable Mention" group at the end of the pack...
  6. 9 likes
    Hurry Tom....Post another howdy doody, and I will like it....
  7. 9 likes
    Anybody here today? I'm lonely without you all...
  8. 9 likes
    Things I learned today about IRS AUR (most common: CP2000 notices): 1. Better to fax responses unless a huge stack of paperwork is involved. The response goes directly to an agent for processing instead of sitting in the mail. 2. IRS is "working" on a way to match K-1 forms. I got the impression that, as of today, IRS does not match K-1s. 3. Always best to provide a statement for any amount listed on line 21, showing each payor EIN and each amount separately. If IRS can exactly match an amount to a 1099, it won't issue a CP2000. 4. Better to call Practioner Priority Line and select Option 5 to be connected to AUR section. Those calls are routed to the front of the line, so less wait time. 5. Never send an amended tax return in response to a CP2000. AUR does not process amended tax returns, and it just muddies the waters. I think I've read questions regarding the above, and thought I'd share with you
  9. 9 likes
    Did you advise him to seek mental help?
  10. 9 likes
    I'm here, nowhere else to go, had some oral surgery this morning, 5 stitches. I was a little tense so I told the doc and nurse a joke to ease my apprehension. CIA director was looking for a new assassin, so he puts an ad in the paper asking that candidates bring their spouses. 2 men and a woman show up with spouses. Director puts each spouse in a separate room. He gives a gun to first man and tells him to go in and kill his wife. He goes in and comes right out, "can't do it, I love my wife." Director gives gun to 2nd guy with same instructions. He too comes right out with same explanation. Director gives the gun to the woman and she goes into room and he hears bang bang bang bang bang....then silence, then thrashing and screaming noises. Woman comes out and Director says "What happened in there?" The woman replies, "well, the gun had blanks so I had to kill him with the chair!"
  11. 9 likes
    I'm sorry but 'balls' is 'vulgar' under the new user agreement. You can't say that shit.
  12. 8 likes
    We are all "crazy Uncle Bobby" in our own right -- BUT -- all mesh nicely together - we could all break bread together and have a GREAT time! (I am the quiet one in the corner) Good folks, good times, GREAT information and willingness to help.
  13. 8 likes
    Without a doubt! If friends could be real family we would have something really special.....and I would look forward to Thanksgiving and no crazy Uncle Bobby.
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    Yes, the pain of stopping short is worse than the pain of falling short. - My Preacher Buddy
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    Abby, you know I love you. And I'm just a "mom" organization. But I love file folders, sharpies, labels, sticky notes. I also spent a good chunk on hum dinger presentation folders and it makes me happy. It makes me happy to pull out a file when a client comes in with a question, and I can show them my notes of the phone call we had a month ago that might as well have been with Kim the Young'Un cause they recall ZERO of what we discussed. There's room for all us. Merica. (I'm also not deleting my data files and am not sure how that rumor got started...)
  18. 8 likes
    CCH will give you that exceptional tech support as "concierge customer care" with their Advantage package, all for the low, low price of $3,759. But wait, there's more...call in the next 10 minutes and we'll throw in...
  19. 8 likes
    A dog gave birth to puppies near the road and was cited for littering...
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    A father puts his young daughter to bed every night and loves listening to her say her prayers. One night she says "God bless Mommy, Daddy, Grandma, and goodbye grandpa." The next day grandpa dies. Father thinks, that's weird. The next night the little girl says "God bless Mommy, Daddy, and goodbye Grandma." Next day grandma dies. Father is shocked and thinks he has a psychic daughter. The third night she says "God bless Mommy and goodbye Daddy." Holy Cow! he thinks. The next day he is careful driving to work and stays in his office watching the clock until it hits midnight, he made it through the day. So he goes home and tells his wife he had a rough day trying to stay alive, she says, "you think you had a bad day, my tennis pro died today!"
  21. 8 likes
    Guy walks into a bar with a toad stuck to his head. "What happened to you?", asked the bartender. "I dunno", says the toad. "It started out as a wart on my butt!"
  22. 8 likes
    A tattered piece of rope; mangled-looking and twisted around, walks into a bar. Bartender looks up, glares, and says "Hey! Are you a cord? We don't serve cords in here!" The rope answers, "No, I'm a frayed knot." (Ba-dum-CHA!)
  23. 8 likes
    Is it unicorn season?
  24. 8 likes
    Hahaha I just got off the phone with a lady that won a purse from TN Lottery, valued at $1300. She asked me what the tax would be before she sent in the W-9. She was smart enough to know she wasn't sending that form in if she couldn't make anything reselling that purse. I almost cried. I may need mental help myself.
  25. 8 likes
    Three guys are hiking through the woods, when they find a magic lamp. One of them picks it up, rubs it, and out pops a Genie. It booms "You have finally freed me after all these years, so I'll grant each one of you 3 wishes." The first guy immediately blurts out "I want a billion dollars." POOF, he's holding a printout that shows his account balance is now in fact 1,000,000,003.50 The second man thinks for a bit, then says "I want to be the richest man alive." POOF, he's holding papers showing his net worth is now well over 100 billion. The third guy thinks even longer about his wish, then says "I want my left arm to rotate clockwise for the rest of my life." POOF, his arm starts rotating. The Genie tells them it's time for their second wish. First guy says: "I want to be married to the most beautiful woman on earth." POOF, a stunning beauty wraps herself around his arm. Second guy says "I want to be good-looking and charismatic, so I can have every girl I want." POOF, his looks change and the first guy's wife immediately starts flirting with him. Third guy says "I want my right arm to rotate counter-clockwise until I die." POOF, now both his arms are rotating, in opposite directions. The genie tells them to think very carefully about their third wish. First guy does, and after a while says "I never want to become sick or injured, I want to stay healthy until I die." POOF, his complexion improves, his acne is gone and his knees don't bother him any more. Second guy says "I never want to grow old. I want to stay 29 forever." POOF, he looks younger already. Third guy smiles triumphantly and says "My last wish is for my head to nod back and forth." POOF, he's now nodding his head and still flailing his arms around. The genie wishes them good luck, disappears, and the men soon go their separate ways. Many years later they meet again and chat about how things have been going. First guy is ecstatic: "I've invested the money and multiplied it many times over, so me and my family will be among the richest of the rich pretty much forever. My wife is a freak in the sheets, and I've never gotten so much as a cold in all these years." Second guy smiles and says "Well, I built charities worldwide with a fraction of my wealth, I'm still the richest guy alive and also revered for my good deeds. I haven't aged a day since we last met, and yes, your wife is pretty wild in bed." Third guy walks in, flailing his arms around and nodding his head, and says: "Guys, I think I screwed up." It's better as a physical joke, giving the punchline with your arms and head going.
  26. 8 likes
    I here too Cat......
  27. 7 likes
    Wrong, you are like in 4th place. Everybody likes you too. Tom
  28. 7 likes
    Drake software is located in Franklin, NC, which is directly in the path of totality for the upcoming solar eclipse. Today they sent out a memo to all users that their customer support will be closed Aug 21 between 2:00 pm and 3:00 pm so their employees can enjoy the eclipse. They also sent a link inviting others who can't get to the path of totality to join their live stream. How cool is that? I'm betting it will be a top-quality feed, because Drake has been instrumental in getting high-powered internet service in what's otherwise a sleepy little mountain community.
  29. 7 likes
    Yes but we mostly use them to clip envelopes to payment vouchers. Gotta get those clients into using Direct Pay.
  30. 7 likes
    I know. All accountant types are/were addicted to office supplies. Just think how excited you get with a free highlighter! You know it's true. But... I'd rather have that 3 grand at the end of the year. Oh, and I love you too! <mwah>
  31. 7 likes
    I'm going to start doing all my paper returns in cursive. They don't teach cursive in school any more, and hardly anybody uses it, so most thieves wouldn't be able to understand the info well enough to steal any identity information anyhow. Now that's REAL security.
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    Nerd humor; from a friend Ingredients: 532.35 cm3 gluten 4.9 cm3 NaHCO3 4.9 cm3 refined halite 236.6 cm3 partially hydrogenated tallow triglyceride 177.45 cm3 crystalline C12H22O11 177.45 cm3 unrefined C12H22O11 4.9 cm3 methyl ether of protocatechuic aldehyde Two calcium carbonate-encapsulated avian albumen-coated protein 473.2 cm3 theobroma cacao 236.6 cm3 de-encapsulated legume meats (sieve size #10) To a 2-L jacketed round reactor vessel (reactor #1) with an overall heat transfer coefficient of about 100 Btu/F-ft2-hr, add ingredients 1, 2 and 3 with constant agitation. In a second 2-L reactor vessel with a radial flow impeller operating at 100 rpm, add ingredients 4, 5, 6, and 7 until the mixture is homogenous. To reactor #2, add ingredient 8, followed by three equal volumes of the homogenous mixture in reactor #1. Additionally, add ingredient 9 and 10 slowly, with constant agitation. Care must be taken at this point in the reaction to control any temperature rise that may be the result of an exothermic reaction. Using a screw extrude attached to a #4 nodulizer, place the mixture piece-meal on a 316SS sheet (300 x 600 mm). Heat in a 460K oven for a period of time that is in agreement with Frank & Johnston's first order rate expression (see JACOS, 21, 55), or until golden brown. Once the reaction is complete, place the sheet on a 25C heat-transfer table, allowing the product to come to equilibrium. Enjoy!
  34. 7 likes
    Client stopped by the office this morning and; (maybe not quite this scarce, but still...) https://www.amazon.com/Bring-Me-Unicorn-Lindbergh-1922-1928/dp/0156141647 said he was going to sell $75K of stock, but first wanted to know: "What would be the effect on my taxes?" What'sa matter with this guy? Doesn't he know it's standard practice throughout the tax preparation world for clients to sell now and ask that question next April?
  35. 7 likes
    Bill.......Chair beatings are kinna harsh..?..
  36. 7 likes
    I just showed this to my wife and she chuckled and said that was cute! Cute? I am not sure that is the word that I would have picked! I think I better hide the chairs tonight!
  37. 7 likes
    I had an unexpected visit from my younger daughter, on her way to work. Did a CPE course online on trust and estate taxation that was actually useful. It was part 2 of 3; part 1 got finished last week and now I need to find time for part 3, but that's three hours. Did the bulk of one return earlier today, have two to tackle this afternoon. One is a royal PITA, and the other is disorganized. So I am poking around online and dithering. Kinda like @jklcpa's procrastinating but with less structure. LOVE @BHoffman's picture! Great to hear from everybody.
  38. 7 likes
    I'm here between projects, procrastinating on whichever job to tackle next.
  39. 7 likes
    Getting a little testy here, aren't we? Cut that out!
  40. 7 likes
    All I do are tax returns. No accounting, no payroll. I'm not ready to retire yet, but at 61 I am still thinking about how many more years I want to work. "WANT" being the operative word. This year I did clean up my client list by sending several clients away, for a better fit. We all know what that means. I don't want to work forever. I am getting less and less enamored with being locked to my computer for 4 months, having over 40 extensions, and having the tax season drag on until October 15th. I want to play. I want to go outside and play in the sun. Without any work hanging over my head. I love my clients, love my work, love the challenge. But most of all, I love the "seasonality" of the business. And that season is spreading out too much. The responsibilities and complexities of being a tax professional might be what actually has me whipped. It's almost like I have to stay sober all year long. Geez...
  41. 6 likes
    Clearly we have too much time on our hands, are bored, or tired, or looking for diversions, or ....
  42. 6 likes
    I bow to the math wizard but I think it is only $100. $100 cash was taken and given back in exchange for $70 of goods and $30 in cash. Net loss to store is $100 in my simple way of thinking.
  43. 6 likes
    Besides, a small scratch won't render a paper copy useless.
  44. 6 likes
    In a previous life, I was a research assistant in genetic engineering in molecular biology. This 'recipe' is not so foreign sounding. To this day I have to measure liquids at the bottom of the meniscus at eye level.
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    I am here. Trying to tie up loose ends before my two week vacation which starts Saturday
  48. 6 likes
    Present.
  49. 6 likes
    I'm here too! Working on an S Corp and a few other odds and ends.
  50. 6 likes
    Aaawwww! I needed to hear from a friend too. I just finished sitting through a two hour webinar on Section 263A.