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N/T- Save me, save them


jklcpa

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Save me from these long and exasperating telephone calls with older clients that want to chat and can't grasp concept of the simplest of questions. Email with several clients isn't going much better. After a total of 7, yes 7, emails back and forth, I hope this one person knows that I now need the ONE 1099R for her ONE ira distribution.  I kid you not!  Seven!!!!!!!  And then she asked where the distribution was from again!  I know she had bad health issues last year...maybe she's on some medications that are affecting her brain!

We should probably save my clients from me too.  Yesterday was a wrap on another client that was making me crazy with numerous chatty emails back and forth, and then tried to fax me the e-file signature forms and had them in her machine backwards so that I got blank pages... I got the Fed fine and THREE TIMES she sent blank pages for the state form. THREE TIMES!  Yes, I'm shouting now.  I had to take an allergy pill this morning and that isn't helping either.

An intervention may be needed later on today.  One guy that I've told repeatedly how many different ways he can get his info to me then thought it would be ok if he just dropped by sometime today when I'm booked full with appts.  This was after I told him my availability back two weeks ago and he never bothered to contact me again until yesterday.  He's one that thinks he can tell me how this process is going to flow... I have other ideas about that, and no one is going to dictate to me how I choose to run my business. No one. 

I can't wait for this to be over. :spaz::wall:

/rant  

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I, we ALL, hear you.  I just escorted out the 92 year old, still driving, after hearing again and again and again about, well, her late husband dead 30+ years, where she went to college and how she had no idea where her SSA1099 was but she received the same amount every month, blah, blah, blah. And that was after the 78  year old with inheritance issues, I could go on but won't.  Just know that you are not alone.

I was planning 2 more seasons after this one.  Might be rethinking that :unsure:

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All the blah blah blah is killing me, too. One whose husband went to jail for failing to pay spousal support... I need to know exactly how much money he actually PAID you in 2016.

Pretty clear, right?

After about 2 minutes of BBFB (blah blah frikkin blah) she said, "Donna, what would YOU do if you were me?"

"Honestly? If someone was paying me taxable spousal support, I would know exactly how much he paid me, and I would give that number to my tax pro. Honestly, that's what I'd do."

She finally shut up.

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Bahahahaha, this morning I did the Sch A seminar for a new client.  She had 14 noncash contribution receipts with nothing on them. 

She figured that those treasures were worth $2200.00

Me:  Your standard deduction is $12,600.   That's the amount the IRS will allow you to deduct without itemizing your deductions.  Your mortgage interest is $2,500, your property tax is $500, and let's say these non-cash contributions that are blank amount to $3,000.  (No I did not mention sales tax, stay with me here.)  I write the numbers down and show the sum is $6,000.  Do you want to take the $12,600 or the $6,000 deduction?

She:  I don't know, are you allowed to give me advice?

ISTG (I swear to G**) this happened.  You cannot make this up.

I will be filling out the Sch A to show her, and I wasted fifteen minutes on the seminar, too.  The seminar took longer for her, as you might imagine.  I'll charge her ten bucks for the two minutes to fill out Sch A, print it, copy it, BBFB.  No, I ain't doing the 8283.

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The phone call today with my 86 year old deaf client was worthy of an Abbott and Costello skit.  "Who's on first?"

This so I could answer his question on where his non-working, no income at all, stay-at-home daughter could get tax forms, and after shouting at the top of my lungs that she didn't need to file if she didn't have income.  She wants to file, he said, because she has a child and believes she will get a big tax refund.  I screamed out the local VITA phone number three times before he got it right, hung up, and then fainted from hyperventilating.

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I just have to say that I am enjoying this tax season.  So far I have prepared my return and my granddaughter's.  I came into the office this morning at 9:30.  I am still doing sales tax and payroll and a little bookkeeping.  Semi-retirement is nice.  I guess I really shouldn't post this, but I am.  Rita may hug me.

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4 minutes ago, GeneInAlabama said:

I just have to say that I am enjoying this tax season... Rita may hug me.

Are you kidding?  I've laughed my head off all day.  I would give anything for a video of this day in this office.  Only you people could believe this without seeing it. 

I really do love my job, and wow, these people need us.  BAD.  SO.  BAD.

Whew, still can't stop laughing, guys.  Good hugs for you, and you, and you...

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29 minutes ago, GeneInAlabama said:

I just have to say that I am enjoying this tax season.  So far I have prepared my return and my granddaughter's.  I came into the office this morning at 9:30.  I am still doing sales tax and payroll and a little bookkeeping.  Semi-retirement is nice.  I guess I really shouldn't post this, but I am.  Rita may hug me.

To be honest though, I am beginning to get a little hungry.

 

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ARRRRRGH!   My client that is moving to Georgia just received corrected 1099-INT and 1099-B figures from her brokerage account with different figures for bond prem amortization and sizable bases corrections (reduced) of funds sold for covered lots.   She settles on the sale of her house here in DE on 4/17 and will be leaving the state the following day.  *@$k^(#!&<% and many other bad words.    :wall: 

Next rant, I met with a very nice new referred client yesterday with a return he said was easy. He didn't bring last year's return, wife brought the rest of their package today. No return, said that's all they got from last year's preparer...a respected CPA firm over the state line in PA.  She's going to ask former preparer for a copy of LY's return.  hahaha!   All she had were unpaid vouchers for 2017 estimates and the 2-year comparison. I wonder if they mailed the client copy to the IRS?!   This return has everything except the kitchen sink...easy my ass. High income multi-state earnings, investment accounts, NII tax, medicare add-on, employee stock options sold, AMT, 2 home offices in their McMansion and supposedly not using the safe harbor so I don't have a starting point for depreciation.  Two kids' dep care and education credit info for oldest child all that will phase out. Problems with one page of the University printouts showing one summary total of payments in 2016 but another with the payments dated 1/717 for the fall 2016 tuition! So glad we had to have that extensive discussion for things that are of no benefit and looked problematic.

And of course, part of their reason for leaving former CPA was they charged too much... when their work also included handling a collection issue of PA local earned income tax for several years because former-former CA preparer used in the year of move into PA knew nothing about the PA local taxes so those were never filed and paid.

More bad words....and back to work!

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#1 Pensioner - comes in 4 times each season for everything: "Just got this in the mail. What's it all about?" BB: The company's raising your pension 40 cents next year.  

#2 EIC guy calls - "Where's my refund?" BB: (checking IRS website) It's been applied to a debt - you told me didn't owe anybody. "Well, there was one I didn't mention."

#3 Beautician (yak-yak-yak-yak...must be an occupational hazard) "Put my car miles down-everybody says that counts a lot."  BB: Okay, how much?  "At least 100 miles."    

#4 "What's the fee?" BB:$125 to $145. "My son paid $75." BB: He's single with one W-2 - you've got 4 W-2s, AOTC, and child care. "We'll have to talk it over." Out the door.

#5 "I've got two house mortgages so I guess I can't use both." BB: No, interest on a vacation house is okay. "Actually we rent it out." BB: We don't have any figures on that and will need to put it down. "No, we don't clear anything on it."  BB: How so? "They just make the payment." :blink: 

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Client comes in.  Two new dependents this year (parents), release of exemption to the ex, missing basis on trades that needed to be tracked down, complications etc - we all know the type.

Wants to know why her refund is less than $200 when last year it was almost $5K, since "nothing has changed, really."  Oh, really?!?!  $57K bonus and up a bracket - nope, not much of a change at all.

How can people get a $57K bonus and not notice during the year?!

Then she wants to know why her bill went up -- lady, I still don't charge you what the aggravation is worth.  Sheesh.  :wall:

Rant over.

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