Jump to content
ATX Community

Elrod

Members
 View Profile  See their activity

  • Posts

    1,220

  • Joined

  • Last visited

  • Days Won

    77

 Content Type 

Posts posted by Elrod

  3. NT - Incredible dogs

    in General Chat

    Posted

    Four workers were discussing how smart their dogs were. The first was an engineer who said his dog could do math calculations. His dog was named "T-Square", and he told him to get some paper and draw a square, a circle and a triangle, which the dog did with no sweat. The accountant said he thought his dog was better. His dog was named "Slide Rule". He told him to fetch a dozen cookies, bring them back, and divide them into piles of three, which he did with no problem. The chemist said that was good, but he felt his dog was better. His dog "Measure" was told to get a quart of milk and pour seven ounces into a ten ounce glass. The dog did this with no problem.

    All three men agreed this was very good and that their dogs were equally smart. They all turned to the union member and said, "What can your dog do?". The Teamster called his dog whose name was "Coffee Break" and said, "Show the fellows what you can do". Coffee Break went over and ate the cookies, drank the milk, went to the bathroom on the paper, claimed he injured his back while eating, filed a grievance for unsafe working conditions, applied for Workmen's Compensation and left for home on sick leave. :spaz:

  12. For The Good Times:

    in General Chat

    Posted

    Twenty Questions

    1. How Do You Catch a Unique Rabbit?

    Unique Up On It

    2. How Do You Catch a Tame Rabbit?

    Tame Way, Unique Up On It

    3. How Do Crazy People Go Through The Forest?

    They Take The Psycho Path

    4. How Do You Get Holy Water?

    You Boil The Hell Out Of It

    5. What Do Fish Say When They Hit a Concrete Wall?

    Dam!

    6. What Do Eskimos Get From Sitting On The Ice too Long?

    Polaroids

    7. What Do You Call a Boomerang That Doesn't work?

    A Stick

    8. What Do You Call Cheese That Isn't Yours?

    Nacho Cheese

    9. What Do You Call Santa's Helpers?

    Subordinate Clauses

    10. What Do You Call Four Bullfighters In Quicksand?

    Quatro Sinko

    11. What Do You Get From a Pampered Cow?

    Spoiled Milk

    12. What Do You Get When You Cross a Snowman With a Vampire?

    Frostbite

    13. What Lies At The Bottom Of The Ocean And Twitches?

    A Nervous Wreck

    14. What's The Difference Between Roast Beef And Pea Soup?

    Anyone Can Roast Beef

    15. Where Do You Find a Dog With No Legs?

    Right Where You Left Him

    16. Why Do Gorillas Have Big Nostrils?

    Because They Have Big Fingers

    17. Why Don't Blind People Like To Sky Dive?

    Because It Scares The Dog

    18. What Kind Of Coffee Was Served On The Titanic?

    Sanka

    19. What Is The Difference Between a Harley And a Hoover?

    The Location Of The Dirt Bag

    20. Why Did Pilgrims' Pants Always Fall Down?

    Because They Wore Their Belt Buckle On Their Hat. :spaz:

  14. This is what we gotta watch...

    in General Chat

    Posted

    Media Relations Office Washington, D.C. Media Contact: 202.622.4000

    www.IRS.gov/newsroom Public Contact: 800.829.1040

    IRS Continues to Increase Oversight of Tax Return Preparers to Improve

    Compliance, Taxpayer Service

    IR-2010-44, April 7, 2010

    WASHINGTON — As the April 15 tax deadline approaches, the Internal Revenue Service

    today announced initial results from its stepped-up effort involving enforcement and

    education to combat unscrupulous tax return preparers and protect the nation’s taxpayers.

    The IRS said it has conducted more than 5,000 field visits to tax return preparers this fiscal

    year. In addition, the IRS has worked with the Department of Justice to pursue

    questionable return preparers, an effort that has led to 56 indictments, 25 convictions and

    21 civil injunctions since Jan. 1, 2010.

    “We are working to help ensure taxpayers receive competent and ethical service from

    qualified tax professionals,” said IRS Commissioner Doug Shulman. “Our efforts this tax

    season are part of a longer-term effort to improve the oversight of this critical part of the tax

    system. The vast majority of tax return preparers provide solid service, but we need to do

    more to protect taxpayers.”

    Shulman announced in January the results of a six-month study of the tax return preparer

    industry, which proposed new registration, testing and continuing education of tax return

    preparers. With more than 80 percent of American households using a tax preparer or tax

    software to help them prepare and file their taxes, higher standards for the tax return

    preparer community will significantly enhance protections and service for taxpayers,

    increase confidence in the tax system and result in greater compliance with tax laws over

    the long term. While this longer-term effort is underway, the IRS has taken several

    immediate steps this filing season to assist taxpayers.

    Enforcement Efforts

    The IRS has worked closely with the Justice Department this tax season to increase legal

    actions against unscrupulous tax return preparers, obtaining 21 civil injunctions, 56

    indictments and 25 convictions of return preparers so far in 2010. More information is

    available at the IRS Civil and Criminal Actions page on irs.gov. and at the Department of

    Justice Tax Division page on DOJ.gov.

    “The IRS appreciates the strong support of the Justice Department for its efforts to pursue

    and shut down bad actors in the tax return industry,” Shulman said. “This effort makes a

    real difference for the nation’s taxpayers and helps protect the many tax professionals who

    play by the rules.”

    “While the majority of return preparers provide excellent service to their clients, a few

    unscrupulous tax preparers file false and fraudulent returns to defraud the government and

    the tax-paying public. Those actions are illegal, and can result in substantial civil penalties

    as well as criminal prosecution, for both the return preparers and their customers who knew

    or should have known better. Taxpayers should choose carefully when hiring a tax

    preparer,” said John A. DiCicco, Acting Assistant Attorney General of the Justice

    Department’s Tax Division.

    Also during this filing season, the IRS used investigative tools on a broad basis, including

    agents posing as taxpayers, to seek out and stop unscrupulous preparers from filing

    inaccurate returns. To date, the IRS conducted 230 undercover visits to tax return

    preparers. In addition, dozens of search warrants have been completed.

    The IRS will continue to work closely with the Department of Justice to pursue civil and

    criminal action as appropriate.

    Education Efforts

    In January, the IRS sent more than 10,000 letters to tax return preparers. These letters

    reminded them of their obligation to prepare accurate returns for their clients, reviewed

    common errors, and outlined the consequences of filing incorrect returns. The letters went

    to preparers with large volumes of specific tax returns where the IRS typically sees frequent

    errors, although simply receiving a letter was not an indication the preparer had problems.

    The IRS followed up with field visits to about 2,400 tax return preparers who received these

    letters to discuss many of the issues mentioned in the letter. Separately, the IRS conducted

    other compliance and educational visits with return preparers on a variety of other issues.

    All told, IRS representatives visited more than 5,000 paid preparers to encourage and help

    them avoid filing incorrect or fraudulent returns for their clients.

    The IRS will be reviewing the results of these letters and visits to determine steps for future

    filing seasons.

    Future Efforts

    The IRS has recently begun to implement a number of steps to increase oversight of

    federal tax return preparers. This includes proposed regulations that would require paid tax

    return preparers to obtain and use a preparer tax identification number (PTIN). Later this

    year, the IRS will propose additional regulations requiring competency tests and continuing

    professional education for paid tax return preparers who are not attorneys, certified public

    accountants and enrolled agents.

    Setting higher standards for the tax preparer community will significantly enhance

    protections and services for taxpayers, increase confidence in the tax system and result in

    greater compliance with tax laws over the long term. Other measures the IRS anticipates

    taking are highlighted in Publication 4832, Return Preparer Review, issued earlier this year.

    Help for Taxpayers before April 15

    As the tax deadline approaches, the IRS reminds taxpayers that most tax return preparers are

    professional, honest and provide excellent service to their clients. But a few simple steps can

    help people choose a good tax return preparer and avoid fraud:

    Be wary of tax preparers who claim they can obtain larger refunds than others.

    Avoid tax preparers who base their fees on a percentage of the refund.

    Use a reputable tax professional who signs the tax return and provides a copy.

    Consider whether the individual or firm will be around months or years after the return has

    been filed to answer questions about the preparation of the tax return.

    Check the person’s credentials. Only attorneys, CPAs and enrolled agents can represent

    taxpayers before the IRS in all matters, including audits, collection and appeals. Other

    return preparers may only represent taxpayers for audits of returns they actually prepared.

    Find out if the return preparer is affiliated with a professional organization that provides its

    members with continuing education and other resources and holds them to a code of

    ethics.

    More information is available on IRS.gov, including IRS Fact Sheet 2010-03, How to Choose a

    Tax Preparer and Avoid Tax Fraud.

    —30—

    http://www.irs.gov/pub/irs-news/ir-10-044.pdf

  21. I'm so broke....

    in General Chat

    Posted

    I'm so broke, I go to KFC and lick other peoples fingers.

    I'm so broke me and my girlfriend got married for the rice.

    I'm so broke that I just went into McDonald's and put a small fry on layaway.

    If pickles were 10 cents a truckload I couldn't buy a wart off a cucumber!

    I'm so broke, just to rub two nickels together, I'd have to borrow one.

    We were so broke, that at Christmas, all we could exchange was glances.

    I'm so broke, the bank asked for their calendar back.

    I'm so broke, long distance companies don't even call me to switch!

    If I stopped on a dime, I'd probably owe it to someone.

    I ain't broke, but I'm severely bent.

    Someone saw me kicking a can down the street, and when asked what I was doing I said, "Moving."

×
×
  • Create New...