kcjenkins Posted June 6, 2008 Report Share Posted June 6, 2008 Farmer John vs. Mrs. Farmer John... A farmer walks into an attorney’s office wanting to file for a divorce. The attorney asks, “May I help you?” The farmer says, “Yeah. I want to get one of those dee-vorces.” The attorney asks, “Well, do you have any grounds?” The farmer replies, “Yeah. I got about 140 acres.” The attorney says, “No, you don’t understand. Do you have a case?” The farmer says, “No, I don’t have a Case, but I have a John Deere.” The attorney says, “No you don’t understand, I mean do you have a grudge?” The farmer says, “Yeah, I got a grudge. That’s where I park my John Deere.” The attorney says, “No, sir, I mean do you have a suit?” The farmer says, “Yessir, I got a suit. I wear it to church on Sundays.” The exasperated attorney says, “Well, sir, does your wife beat you up or anything?” The farmer says, “No, sir, we both get up about 4:30.” Finally, the attorney asks, “Okay, let me put it this way. WHY DO YOU WANT A DIVORCE?” And the farmer replies, “Well, I cain't never have a meaningful conversation with her!” Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kcjenkins Posted June 6, 2008 Author Report Share Posted June 6, 2008 Remember, if a dog was the teacher you would learn things like: * When loved ones come home, always run to greet them. * Never pass up the opportunity to go for a joyride. * Allow the experience of fresh air and the wind in your face to be pure ecstasy. * Take naps. * Stretch before rising. * Run, romp, and play daily. * Thrive on attention and let people touch you. * Avoid biting when a simple growl will do. * On warm days, stop to lie on your back on the grass. * On hot days, drink lots of water and lie under a shady tree. * When you're happy, dance around and wag your entire body. * Delight in the simple joy of a long walk. * Eat with gusto and enthusiasm. Stop when you have had enough. * Be loyal. Never pretend to be something you're not. * If what you want lies buried, dig until you find it. * When someone is having a bad day, be silent, sit close by and nuzzle them gently. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
joelgilb Posted June 6, 2008 Report Share Posted June 6, 2008 Sounds like some of my clients Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
joanmcq Posted June 7, 2008 Report Share Posted June 7, 2008 My doggie wags with her whole body, so I have to in response. It does do wonders! I was gone overnight at the ethics seminar, and the dog and my old kitty are so happy I'm home...and so so am I. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Danielle Posted June 7, 2008 Report Share Posted June 7, 2008 My doggie wags with her whole body, so I have to in response. It does do wonders! Oh my goodness doesn't it though! Dogs are wonderful things for therapy. My parents have a standard poodle that she just gets so excited when I come home she can turn a horrible day into a great one. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.