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NT: joke of the day


Catherine

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The recession, which has a specific definition, may be over, but the economy is still bad.

How bad is it?

The economy is so bad that I got a pre-declined credit card in the mail.

The economy is so bad I ordered a burger at McDonald's and the kid behind the counter asked, "Can you afford fries with that?"

The economy is so bad that CEOs are now playing miniature golf.

The economy is so bad if the bank returns your check marked "Insufficient Funds," you call them and ask if they meant you or them.

The economy is so bad Hot Wheels and Matchbox stocks are trading higher than GM.

The economy is so bad McDonald's is selling the quarter ouncer.

The economy is so bad parents in Beverly Hills fired their nannies and have had to learn their children's names.

The economy is so bad a truckload of Americans was caught sneaking into Mexico.

The economy is so bad Motel Six won't leave the light on for you anymore.

and...

The economy is so bad Exxon-Mobil was forced to lay off 25 Congressmen.

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xThe first man married a woman from Pennsylvania . He told her that she

was to do the dishes and house cleaning. It took a couple of days,

but on the third day, he came home to see a clean house and dishes

washed and put away.

The second man married a woman from Indiana He gave his wife

orders that she was to do all the cleaning, dishes and the cooking.

The first day he didn't see any results, but the next day he saw it

was better. By the third day, he saw his house was clean, the dishes

were done and there was a huge dinner on the table.

The third man married a girl from THE SOUTH. He ordered her to

keep the house cleaned, dishes washed, lawn mowed, laundry washed,

and hot meals on the table for every meal. He said the first day he

didn't see anything, the second day he didn't see anything but by

the third day, some of the swelling had gone down and he could see a

little out of his left eye, and his arm was healed enough that he

could fix himself a sandwich and load the dishwasher. He still has

some difficulty when he urinates.

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>>He ordered her to keep the house cleaned, dishes washed, lawn mowed, laundry washed, and hot meals on the table<<

The fourth man moved in with a woman from California. While she was at work, he taped up the frayed cord on her vacuum cleaner, rinsed and stacked the dishes, tried to fix the lawnmower but busted it worse, decided his shirt wasn't that dirty after all, and cut out a pizza coupon so she can go get them something to eat 'cause he already finished all the rice stuff in the slow cooker when he got the munchies. Oh yeah, he also finally nailed the intro to "Cinnamon Girl."

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