Janitor Bob Posted February 5, 2014 Report Share Posted February 5, 2014 guy calls me: Smart Guy: "Hey, JB..you can do my taxes." Me: "Are you asking me or telling me?" silence Me: "Yes, I can do your taxes" Smart Guy: "how much?" Me: "Well, that's hard to say...I would need to see what you have." Smart Guy: Well all I have is one W-2 because I aint going to pick up the other two from where I used to work because Karl told me that If I did not get the W-4s, I don't need to claim those jobs." silence...as I feel the vein in my head throb Smart Guy: to pay ya, I can plow your drive cuz I gots a big plow on my truck and I live in West Liberty can I deduct that I can't keep it in the yard no more cause I knocked down the corner of the porch and Jody got pissed." Me: "Ok...we need to find a time for us to sit down and see what you have" Smart Guy: "Smackin!" Smart Guy: "So how much is it gonna cost and how much do you think I'll get back cuz I wanna get a new grill ill cook ya up some ribs I make the best damn ribs the secret is I use that fancy mustard." Me: "That's great...do you want to get together this weekend?" Smart Guy: "Naaaa...not this weekend, man....Me and Karl are going down to the gun show I like guns" Me: "OK" Smart Guy: "BANG!!!!" "Did I scare you?" I hung up....and then I blocked the number. Perhaps that was wrong...it was definately not polite, but in my defense, I had just been shot. I just can not take any more stupidity in my life. Where do they grow these people and why do they find me? 10 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RitaB Posted February 5, 2014 Report Share Posted February 5, 2014 Crap, did you give him my number? He's on the line now. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kcjenkins Posted February 5, 2014 Report Share Posted February 5, 2014 LOL 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mr. Pencil Posted February 5, 2014 Report Share Posted February 5, 2014 Smart Guy: Well all I have is one W-2 because I aint going to pick up the other two from where I used to work because Karl told me that If I did not get the W-4s, I don't need to claim those jobs. Tell them that only works when they use Free File on the IRS website www.irs.gov. All tax prep firms have to use electronic filing which matches Social Security names and numbers to employer records. But when they file directly with the IRS, it bypasses Social Security! [i think I'm supposed to put a funny face here but I don't have one on my keyboard.] 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RitaB Posted February 5, 2014 Report Share Posted February 5, 2014 Tell them that only works when they use Free File on the IRS website www.irs.gov. All tax prep firms have to use electronic filing which matches Social Security names and numbers to employer records. But when they file directly with the IRS, it bypasses Social Security! [i think I'm supposed to put a funny face here but I don't have one on my keyboard.] OK, I told him, and now he says he's going back to Bob. Thank you. Whew. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jack from Ohio Posted February 5, 2014 Report Share Posted February 5, 2014 I hung up....and then I blocked the number. Perhaps that was wrong...it was definately not polite, but in my defense, I had just been shot. I just can not take any more stupidity in my life. Where do they grow these people and why do they find me? Well Played!!! Is there any chance that he drinks warm Corona beer? 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Janitor Bob Posted February 6, 2014 Author Report Share Posted February 6, 2014 Do not confuse this guy with Chaz, the guy on the corner by Woody's Market that drinks warm Corona. Chaz is the man! 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kcjenkins Posted February 6, 2014 Report Share Posted February 6, 2014 I was wondering what happened to Chaz. Glad to hear he's ok. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Janitor Bob Posted February 6, 2014 Author Report Share Posted February 6, 2014 Chaz (the guy on the corner by Woody's market that drinks warm Corona) is just hangin out with Lenny the Pirate. They assist me with my more complicated tax issues. Lenny the Pirate vomited on my cat, so he is not allowed to hang out at my place as often. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jklcpa Posted February 6, 2014 Report Share Posted February 6, 2014 What about Mary? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Janitor Bob Posted February 6, 2014 Author Report Share Posted February 6, 2014 Crazy Mary is in rehab....got hooked on the bath salts & whiskey. Oddly enough, it actually made her behave a little more normal...for a while, she even quit bathing in the fountains around the court square and was quite a pleasant little old bingo-playing lady....but when she started mixing the Jack with the drugs, it went downhill fast. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RitaB Posted February 6, 2014 Report Share Posted February 6, 2014 I knew Jack was trouble. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jack from Ohio Posted February 6, 2014 Report Share Posted February 6, 2014 I knew Jack was trouble. HEYYYYY What did I do?? 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RitaB Posted February 6, 2014 Report Share Posted February 6, 2014 HEYYYYY What did I do?? Poor Mary. So little bandwidth. So many tears of pity for sweet Mary. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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