Catherine Posted August 28, 2008 Report Share Posted August 28, 2008 With apologies to all the men in the group..... Dear Tech Support: Last year I upgraded from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0 and noticed a distinct slow-down in the overall performance, particularly in the flower and jewelry applications, which operated flawlessly under Boyfriend 5.0. In addition, Husband 1.0 uninstalled many other valuable programs, such as Romance 9.5 and Personal Attention 6.5, and then installed undesirable programs such as NFL 5.0, NHL 4.3, MLB 3.0, and NBA 3.6. Conversation 8.0 no longer runs, and Housecleaning 2.6 simply crashes the system. I've tried running Nagging 5.3 to fix these problems, to no avail. What can I do? Signed, Desperate Dear Desperate: First, keep in mind Boyfriend 5.0 is an Entertainment Package, while Husband 1.0 is an Operating System. Try to enter the command: "C:/ ITHOUGHTYOULOVEDME" to download Tears 6.2, which automatically should install Guilt 3.0. If that application works as designed, Husband 1.0 should then automatically run the applications Jewelry 2.0 and Flowers 3.5. But remember, overuse of the above application can cause Husband 1.0 to default to Grumpy Silence 2.5, Happy Hour 7.0, or Beer 6.1. Beer 6.1 is a very bad program that will create Snoring Loudly. Whatever you do, DO NOT install Mother-in-law 1.0 or reinstall another Boyfriend program. These are not supported applications and will crash Husband 1.0. In summary, Husband 1.0 is a great program, but it does have limited memory and cannot learn new applications quickly. You might consider buying additional software to improve memory and performance. I personally recommend Hot Food 3.0 and Lingerie 7.7. Good Luck, Tech Support Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kcjenkins Posted August 30, 2008 Report Share Posted August 30, 2008 Cute. And tech support has it right about those enhancement programs, Hot Food especially works very well when combined with Lingerie. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Catherine Posted August 30, 2008 Author Report Share Posted August 30, 2008 Cute. And tech support has it right about those enhancement programs, Hot Food especially works very well when combined with Lingerie. I also thought it was a reminder to us all of what level of help proper tech support should provide.... Catherine Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BulldogTom Posted September 3, 2008 Report Share Posted September 3, 2008 OK, don't tell my wife I posted this...... Because wife did not upgrade to enhanced support, she only got the KB canned response to her question from an Indian call center. Had she upgraded support, she would have gotten a live, American Male technical support manager giving her the best technical advice for her particular situation. Here is the advanced support response. Wife needs to install CleanHouse3.1 along with BunsOfSteel6.9 on her own operating system. It would not hurt if she also installed HowtoMassageEgo4.0 and remembered to run program PerfectMakeupAndHair1.0 daily. Finally, if she were also to run FootMassage5.1 and BackRub2.0 on a regular basis, she would find that Husband1.0 makes BiologicalClock9.0 keep perfect time. By following these simple steps, the operating systems of Husband and Wife will actually communicate with each other. Tom (senior support manager) Lodi, CA Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jainen Posted September 3, 2008 Report Share Posted September 3, 2008 >>Wife needs to install CleanHouse3.1<< I can't recommend this program. It requires a fortune in add-on products and it doesn't have an ESC function so it will lock up your whole system in an endless loop. It will especially cause conflicts with career development applications and your favorite role-playing games like DOGZ and all the kid stuff. Some people have short term success with undocumented Alienware, but the best solutions are simple shareware. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lion EA Posted September 3, 2008 Report Share Posted September 3, 2008 Did Jainen just admit to sharing the housework?! I'm very impressed. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jainen Posted September 3, 2008 Report Share Posted September 3, 2008 >>admit to sharing the housework<< Alas, it is the price one pays for the company of a liberated woman (which is all one can find here in Santa Cruz). At least it's better than getting a real job MYSELF! And anyway, there are certain places in the house I would just as soon my better half wasn't snooping around, if you know what I mean. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PapaJoe Posted September 3, 2008 Report Share Posted September 3, 2008 "there are certain places in the house I would just as soon my better half wasn't snooping around" Gotta hide those Playboy magazines somewhere! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mel in Hawaii Posted September 4, 2008 Report Share Posted September 4, 2008 Why bother appologising to the guys? We have the same problem in reverse. But being tech support and feeling for your troubles, I would suggest instead of adding new applications, run Divorce subroutine. That will wipe out Husband 1.0 and replace it with Alimony 1.0 which is supperior to Husband 1.0 as it has the benefits without any of the system requirements. That will leave Husband 1.0 free to run in Thailand or Philippines, but hard to find when Alimony 1.0 breaks down. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lion EA Posted September 4, 2008 Report Share Posted September 4, 2008 But Rich Boyfriend 1.0 is fun in the interim. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BulldogTom Posted September 4, 2008 Report Share Posted September 4, 2008 But Rich Boyfriend 1.0 is fun in the interim. Be careful with that program, as CurrentWife1.0 is an antivirus program that causes multiple problems for Rich Boyfriend 1.0. Current Wife 1.0 has many additional applications at her disposal, including Private Investigator 24.7, Divorce Lawyer 100K, and Joint Accounts 2.1. These are particulary nasty programs that will convert Rich Boyfriend 1.0 into Why Are You Stalking Me 1.0 and will make the program I Still Love My Wife 9.0 run in a continuous loop until Rich Boyfriend 1.0 is uninstalled on every operating system attached to the WWW. Tom Lodi, CA Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jainen Posted September 4, 2008 Report Share Posted September 4, 2008 >>Rich Boyfriend 1.0 is uninstalled<< I believe Rich Boyfriend is a stand-alone program that doesn't require support. I've tried to register several times, but I always end up as an NPC. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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