Laugh of the Day

[kcjenkins]

THE PERKS OF BEING 60+

1. Kidnappers are not very interested in you.

2. In a hostage situation you are likely to be released first.

3. No one expects you to run - anywhere.

4. People call at 9 PM and ask, "Did I wake you?"

5. People no longer view you as a hypochondriac.

6. There is nothing left to learn the hard way.

7. Things you buy now won't wear out.

8. You can eat dinner at 4 P.M.

9. You enjoy hearing about other peoples' operations.

10. You get into heated arguments about pension plans.

11. You have a party and the neighbors don't even realize it.

12. You no longer think of speed limits as a challenge.

13. You quit trying to hold your stomach in, no matter who walks into the room.

14. You sing along with elevator music.

15. Your eyes won't get much worse.

16. Your investment in health insurance is finally beginning to pay off.

17. Your joints are more accurate meteorologists than the national weather service.

18. Your secrets are safe with your friends, because they can't remember them either.

19. Your supply of brain cells is finally down to manageable size.

20. You can't remember who sent you this list.

[jainen]

>>perks of being 60+<<

All right, KC, you win. That's 20 things I can't disagree with you on!

The only thing I CAN say is that my personal favorite isn't on the list--NO MORE PARENT-TEACHER CONFERENCES!

[kcjenkins]

LOL

[Kea]

I can relate to most of them and I'm not yet 60!

[Guest Taxed]

Those senior citizen discounts come in handy.

I get get a nice hot meal at my senior center for $3.50.

[Lion EA]

I like the senior discounts. Going to the movies Sunday.

[taxxcpa]

They no longer check your ID if you order a beer.

I was in a liquor store the other day and saw a sign that told employees to check everyone's ID that looked like they were under 30. They didn't check mine. I have a daughter that is over 30 and people still think she is in high school. (She IS stil in school--she is the principal).

[JohnH]

My favorite senior citizen discount story goes back many years, to the time when fast food retaurants first inroduced senior discounts. My wife's sister and brother-in-law had stopped by a Hardee's to buy breakfast at the drive-through. As they rolled up the the window, the young cashier excitedly told them the restaurant now offers senior dicounts and they could save 10% by just signing up.

My wife's sister (who was slighly over 60 at the time) replied with a question - "What made you think we would qualify for the discount?" The young cashier replied sheepishly, "The manager told me to just use my judgment."

[Guest Taxed]

>> I have a daughter that is over 30 and people still think she is in high school. <<

My youngest sister is petite (48) and she gets carded all the time. I guess some girls are lucky they can maintain their youthful looks.

[Terry O]

:spaz:

[jklcpa]

JohnH, that could have been me! During college I worked as a sales clerk in a small retail store. Computerized cash registers were fairly new and the senior discount had to be entered before ringing any items, and because the seniors would forget to mention the discount until they were ready to pay, we were instructed to always ask before ringing the sale. Otherwise, we would have to void the entire sale and start completely over If they were entitled and didn't say so. Those over 60 were to get the discount. There was one lady that was prematurely gray and had enough wrinkles...you guessed it, she was very offended because she was only in her mid-40s! I thought she was going to slap me.

[Guest Taxed]

>>> There was one lady that was prematurely gray and had enough wrinkles. <<<

I don't think John Freida had invented his foaming hair colors then??

[Catherine]

Two stories on me:

2007. Had taken my younger daughter (14 at the time) to a fiddle camp in CA and we were in the airport with others, waiting for the shuttle bus to go to camp. Lady driver for the shuttle company came in, saw my daughter and I standing together, and said, "Oh, cool -- twins!" Gwen is so wonderful that she wasn't even offended. That was when I decided the grey hair needed to go (for a time, anyway) and started coloring again. (I had a sunhat on; the driver couldn't see the grey.)

And about two years ago, buying champagne for New Year's at a new store - got carded. Asked the clerk, "Do you mean it or are you just being nice?" and her response, "I just need to see ID." Saw my birth year (1958) and *scowled* at me!

LOL.

[Guest Taxed]

Does your daughter still look like you now at her current age? Better hide your driver's license.

[Catherine]

Does your daughter still look like you now at her current age? Better hide your driver's license.

She's 20 now; older one is 23. Just a couple weeks ago all four of us went to dinner; server thought it was a dad and his three daughters. We had a good laugh over it. We also sound absolutely identical on the phone. Only my husband can tell our voices apart immediately -- and then only if he doesn't have background noise from wherever he is calling from.

Drove me nuts when I was younger, as I was in my late 20's that one could tell just by looking at me that I was probably old enough to drive. Went out with some friends in my early 20's (only had one drink all night) and got carded (a) upon entry by the door guy, ( by the waitress, © by the bartender who didn't believe the waitress carded me, (d) by the manager walking by, and (e) by a cop who came in for some reason. By that time I had given up and just left my license out on the table. A couple other folks stopped to check as well; details are lost in the mists of time.