Leaderboard

Accounting client of mine called in a panic on Friday. Computer crashed (video card) and bought a new one with Windows 8. Installed Peachtree (Sage 50; whatever they're calling it this week) and it will NOT run. Sage will NOT help as they do not support Windows 8. I told him to downgrade to Windows 7. As for me, my new computer (that I am still configuring) is Windows 7. My principle on computer OS changes is to make the change as late as possible and let other people be the guinea pigs for errors, incompatibilities, and other problems. So far, so good. ^_^

How the Hostess Company Is Being Split Up You may have heard that Hostess Bakery plants shut down due to a workers' strike, but you may not have heard how it was split up: the State Department hired all the Twinkies, the Secret Service hired all the HoHos, the generals are sleeping with the Cupcakes and the voters sent all the Ding Dongs to Congress.

I go to the corner store to buy some tasty Faygo soft drinks. On the counter is a jar for our local fire work display. I get $ .52 cents back in change, and put it in the jar. The fire works display is thousands of dollars, done by professionals on a beautiful lake. Next 4th of July I get there early for a beach side "free" seat. Professional display est. = $8,000.00 Front row seat est. = $ 25.00 $8,025.00 My investment = ($ .52) Depreation-lawn chair = ($ .04) $ 8,024.44 ....Divided by estimated number of viewers = 3,000 = $ 2.67 My taxable income = $ 2.67 - $ .56 = $ 2.11 Tax on said income = $ .30 Next time I'll take the wife with me.......She remembers to bring the Fagyo.

Actually of course they WERE addressed when they were first enacted (or later changed). When congress in it's wisdom decided that sales tax could not be used as an itemized deduction after December 31, 2011, they must have had a good reason to do so. Why should we demand that they change their minds now? Our country needs fiscal integrity and stability. What could be better than intending to carry out the laws that we pass?

I think it is an awkward but practical solution to a complex problem. We all know that SOMETHING is going to change, but not only the 'what' but the 'when' of the changes is impossible to determine at this time. And we all know that come Jan, all those hundreds of thousands of people who get big 'refunds' of money that they did not pay in are going to be screaming if there is any delay in them getting their annual 'gift' from their favorite Uncle. Many of those will not be effected much either way, and they will want to file on the first day, as they have come to expect to be able to do.

Last week for Thanksgiving, my mom went to my sister's house for the traditional feast. Knowing how gullible my sister is, my mom decided to play a trick: She asked my sister to pick up something from the store. When my sister left my mom took the turkey out of the oven, removed the stuffing, stuffed a Cornish hen, inserted it into the turkey, and re-stuffed the turkey. She then placed the bird(s) back in the oven. When it was time for dinner, my sister pulled the turkey out of the oven and proceeded to remove the stuffing. When her serving spoon hit something, she reached in and pulled out the little bird. With a look of total shock on her face, my mother exclaimed, "Patricia, you've cooked a pregnant bird!!" Upon pondering this horrifying news, my sister started to cry. It took the family two hours to convince her that turkeys lay eggs! Yep -- Patricia is blonde!

Never Buy Version 1.0 Torpedoes Some years ago, I worked with a fellow with the very British name of Ken Appleby. He had a Spitfire, I had my '74 B, and we used to motor out to Pickwick's Pub and throw darts after work on occasion. Ken used to work for Lucas in the UK, specifically for a division of Lucas that did military electronics. My favorite of his stories was about the time he had been working on a computer-controlled torpedo. It used magnetic core memory to store the programs, which had the advantage of being very non-volatile as well as not susceptible to EMP discharge. So Ken got to ride on the boat for the first test of the torpedo that used the computer with his program in it. Somewhere out in the North Sea, on a Royal Navy cutter, Ken and his crew launched the first ever run of this new weapon, and Ken learned a new respect for debugging. The program was supposed to make the torpedo shoot off the boat, dive to a depth at which it couldn't be easily detected, then circle toward the target, climb to striking depth, and hit the target. There were on-board sensors to detect sea level, and the torpedo was supposed to travel at a preset distance below sea level, with constant feedback keeping it on track. Somehow, somewhere, Ken had multiplied one of the 3D coordinates by a negative number, and this error soon propagated through the transformation matrix (the mathematical construct that models 3D space), with predictable results. Within instants of hitting the water, the torpedo -- instead of sinking out of visible range -- blasted up and out from the water in a great silver fountain, then continued skipping across the surface of the blue like some sort of deranged wingless flying fish. Worse yet, instead of circling toward the target, it circled all right, but began to return to the ship that launched it. Fortunately it was not armed, but they still detonated the self-destruct on it rather than let it slice through their ship at 50 knots or whatever rate it traveled. Because of the non-volatile core memory, Ken was able to debug the program from what the Royal Navy frogmen could recover from it, and he fixed the problem for Rev 2.0. But I must admit that the image of the torpedo, splashing happily above the surface of the water like an aroused porpoise, is one that returns to me in idle moments such this. What else would a Lucas torpedo do but try to fly?

Think about a modern computer with all the appriate drivers to run Dos 6.22???? Would put all WIN operating systems to shame!!!

I miss DOS.

All good ones KC. I'm loading up on meat, butter, and desserts. And a thought for the day. If the Maya could see centuries ago that an asteroid was going to crash into us in 2012, why couldn't they see the Spanish coming?

The minister was just starting his sermon when he spotted a man step inside. He beckons him to sit and launches into his lesson on the Ten Commandments. Since it was a new face, the minister makes sure to seek the man out after the service to greet him. "I have to confess," the man says, "that I didn't come in to hear your sermon. I came in to steal a hat, because it's cold and I seem to have lost mine." "What made you stop, then?" the minister asks. "Well, your talking about 'Thou shalt not steal' made me think about it." "Terrific!" the minister says. "Besides," the man continues, "when you got to 'Thou shalt not commit adultery', I remembered where I left my hat."

Had not felt like posting these lately, so felt like I needed to catch up. :P

Gillian McKeith is a Scottish TV health guru advocating a holistic approach to nutrition and health, promoting exercise, and a vegetarian diet of organic fruits and vegetables. She recommends "detox diets", colonic irrigation and supplements, states that yeast is harmful, that the color of food is nutritionally significant, and extols the utility of mapping your pimples and the detailed examination of your feces and urine. Her best-selling book is titled You Are What You Eat. She is 51 years old, and here's her photo: Nigella Lawson is a food writer, journalist and TV chef in England. She eats nothing but meat, butter and desserts. The Sunday Telegraph called her best-selling book How to Eat "the most valuable culinary guide published this decade." She is also 51 years old, and here's her photo: Need I say more? I rest my case.

that is the first thing I thought when I saw the email about the payroll forms. extra cost next year. I use quickbooks for my monthly clients but ATX for 1099's and odd w-2's for tax clients. Now if I have to start paying extra for that convience......... I don't know may be time to start looking elsewhere