ILLMAS Posted April 29, 2010 Report Share Posted April 29, 2010 Sign over a Gynecologist's Office: "Dr. Jones, at your cervix." In a Podiatrist's office: "Time wounds all heels." On a Septic Tank Truck in Oregon: Yesterdays' Meals on Wheels On a Septic Tank Truck sign: "We're #1 in the #2 business." At a Proctologist's door "To expedite your visit please back in." On a Plumber's truck: "We repair what your husband fixed." On a Plumber's truck: "Don't sleep with a drip. Call your plumber." Pizza Shop Slogan: "7 days without pizza makes one weak." At a Tire Shop in Milwaukee: "Invite us to your next blowout." On a Plastic Surgeon's Office door: "Hello. Can we pick your nose?" At a Towing Company: "We don't charge an arm and a leg. We want tows." On an Electrician's truck: "Let us remove your shorts." In a Non-smoking Area: "If we see smoke, we will assume you are on fire and take appropriate action." On a Maternity Room door: "Push. Push. Push." At an Optometrist's Office: If you don't see what you're looking for, you've come to the right place." On a Taxidermist's window: "We really know our stuff" On a Fence: "Salesmen welcome! Dog food is expensive." At a Car Dealership: "The best way to get back on your feet - miss a car payment." Outside a Muffler Shop: "No appointment necessary. We hear you coming." In a Veterinarian's waiting room: "Be back in 5 minutes . . . Sit! . . . Stay!" At the Electric Company: "We would be "de-lighted" if you send in your payment. However, if you don't, you will be." In a Restaurant window: "Don't stand there and be hungry, Come on in and get fed up." In the front yard of a Funeral Home: "Drive carefully. We'll wait." At a Propane Filling Station, "Thank heaven for little grills." And don't forget the sign at a Chicago Radiator Shop: "Best place in town to take a leak." "Wonderful bargains for men with 16 and 17 necks." Signs In a clothing store "Our best is none too good." On a sign on a delicatessen wall: "Persons are prohibited from picking flowers from any but their own graves." On a sign in a Pennsylvania cemetary "Shaky Grounds" Seen on a San Francisco Bay Area coffee shop "Yesterday's Meals on Wheels" Seen on a Septic Tank Truck in Oregon "We're #1 in the #2 business" Seen on Septic Tank Truck in Oregon "Dr. Jones, at your cervix" Sign over a Gynecologist's office. "To expedite your visit please back in" Sign over a Proctologist's door "We repair what your husband fixed" Painted sign on a Plumber's truck: "Don't sleep with a drip. Call your plumber" Sign seen on a Plumber's truck "7 days without pizza makes one weak" Pizza Shop Slogan "Invite us to your next blowout" Sign at a Tire Shop in Milwaukee. "Hello. Can we pick your nose?" On a Plastic Surgeon's Office door: "We don't charge an arm and a leg. We want tows" Sign seen at a Towing company "Let us remove your shorts" On an Electrician's truck "If we see smoke, we will assume you are on fire and take appropriate action" Sign In a non-smoking area in a manufacturing company. "Push. Push. Push" Cute sign for a Maternity Room door huh! "If you don't see what you're looking for, you've come to the right place" Sign seen on an Optometrists Office door "We really know our stuff" Seen on a Taxidermist's office window. "Time wounds all heels" Seen at a Podiatrist's office: "Salesmen welcome! Dog food is expensive" Sign seen on a residential fence in Texas "The best way to get back on your feet - miss a car payment" Sign seen at a Car Dealership in Detroit "We just keep rolling a lawn," JB Instant Lawn, Portland, Oregon "Satisfaction guaranteed or double your trash back" Bunting Trash Service, Evans, Colorado. "We Dry Harder" a Utah concrete products company. "We're easy to get a lawn with," B&G Turf Farm, Helendale, California. "We do more than mow, blow and go" Yardvark's Lawn & Maintenance, Bullhead City, Arizona. "We meet most of our friends by accident" Auto body shop, Fremont, CA (Richard DeBiaso) "No appointment necessary. We hear you coming" Sign on the side of a Muffler Shop in Hood River, Oregon. "Be back in 5 minutes. Sit! Stay!" In a Veterinarian's waiting room "We would be delighted if you send in your payment. However, if you don't, you will be" Maybe At the Electric Company: "Don't stand there and be hungry, Come on in and get fed up" Sign seen in a restaurant's window "Drive carefully. We'll wait" Funeral Home sign, please be careful! "Thank heaven for little grills" Sign seen at propane filling station "Best place in town to take a leak" This Chicago Radiator Shop really knows their customers! "Loaded with experience," Crescent Truck Lines, Hayward, CA (Richard DeBiaso) "Nobody knows the truffles we've seen," Nevada City Truffles, Nevada City, California. "Your pane is our pleasure," Hogan's Window Cleaning, Lake Havasu City, Arizona. "Hired Killer" a California pest exterminator service. (submitted by S. Boyers) "I glove you" Western Oregon Glove Company "Take a spin with us" West Side Laundromat, Helena, Mont. "Let us steer you in the right direction" Santa Fe Meat Company "Our business is growing," Smith Gardens, Washington state "We curl up and dye for you," Orchid Hair Salon, Delta, Colorado. "Don't let a drip spoil your trip," Ray's Radiator Service, Grass Valley, California. "We run a shady business," The Tarp Man, a mobile business seen in Arizona. "Our business is picking up," Grass Valley Disposal Company, Grass Valley, California. "We kick ash," Mad Hatter Air Duct Cleaning, Seattle, Wash. "We meet by accident," Prestige Automotive Center, Kingman, Arizona. "Let us lighten your load," Hey Diddle Diddle Diaper Service, Hollister, California. "Can't get it up?" Willits Winching, Willits, California. (submitted by Joanne Moore) "While you sleep, we loaf," Tahoe House Restaurant and Bakery, Lake Tahoe, California. "Let us strip for you," a furniture refinishing shop near Little Rock, Ark. (submitted by Barry Burton) "A good flush beats a full house," Salcido Plumbing, King City Calif. (submitted by the Johnsons) "A great place to take a leak," Acme Radiator, Bandon, Oregon "Business Sucks," a California vacuum cleaner store. (submitted by S. Boyers) "All the stuff that's neat for both your feet," Dave's Shoes, Grass Valley, Calif. "The Answer To Your Hangups," Art Laminators, Inc., Seattle, Wash. "Have your work done here...and you'll never go anywhere else again," TVS Complete Auto Repair, Temecula, Calif. (submitted by Steve Augustine). "We Take a Bite out of Grime," car wash, Camp Verde, Arizona. (submitted by B.P. Soutrane) Copyright 2000 by Out West Newspaper "It's a Ruff Life," Dog day care and activity center, Phoenix, AZ (Joanne Gardiner) "We're number one in the number two business" Slim's Sanitation, Greeley, Colorado. "After the first whiff, call Cliff." Septic service, Sunshine, Wash. "We don't want an arm and a leg...just your tows!" A towing company, Weaverville, California. (submitted by Todd Steele) "Get your buns in here," Glenn's Pastries, Gallup, New Mexico "It's great to be kneaded," Rainbow Touch Massage, Seattle, Washington "Here today, lawn tomorrow," Oregon Turf and Tree Farm "Spouses Selling Houses," Real estate agents Shari and Ron Laverty, Seattle, Wash. "Let us remove your shorts" Art's Electric, Pullman, Wash. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TAXBILLY Posted April 29, 2010 Report Share Posted April 29, 2010 Pretty funny! taxbilly Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mcb39 Posted April 29, 2010 Report Share Posted April 29, 2010 TAXD OUT is on the front and back of my Jeep and how true it is this time of year. My clients love it. Your list is a keeper. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lion EA Posted April 30, 2010 Report Share Posted April 30, 2010 I used to have a landscaper client named Lawn & Order. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ILLMAS Posted April 30, 2010 Author Report Share Posted April 30, 2010 There was a radiator shop around the corner of where I grew up and this was their slogan: "Best place in town to take a leak" This Chicago Radiator Shop really knows their customers! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jack from Ohio Posted April 30, 2010 Report Share Posted April 30, 2010 Sign at a taxadermy shop... The Buck Stops Here! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RitaB Posted April 30, 2010 Report Share Posted April 30, 2010 On another forum I shared that a client suggested I put "We do Block repair" on my sign. I got chewed out by another forum member. Little did I know. And, yes, I have learned from the error of my ways in case because I just offended someone on here. I apologize in advance. Thank you, and I will leave now. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mcb39 Posted April 30, 2010 Report Share Posted April 30, 2010 On another forum I shared that a client suggested I put "We do Block repair" on my sign. I got chewed out by another forum member. Little did I know. And, yes, I have learned from the error of my ways in case because I just offended someone on here. I apologize in advance. Thank you, and I will leave now. Well, Rita, you got a chuckle out of me. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jainen Posted April 30, 2010 Report Share Posted April 30, 2010 >>I just offended someone on here<< I have rather high standards in that regard, Rita, so I can't imagine anyone being offended by your gentle humor. But I went to profile and signed up as your friend out of solidarity. * * * * * I always planned to hand out pencils that said, "Filing the tax return is just our opening offer." But I would have had to raise my rates fifty cents, and I was afraid my clients wouldn't think I was worth it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RitaB Posted April 30, 2010 Report Share Posted April 30, 2010 I can't imagine anyone being offended by your gentle humor. Yeah, that's what I thought, too, BFF. But, whoa, baby, I got a spanking for the Block repair joke. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jainen Posted April 30, 2010 Report Share Posted April 30, 2010 >>I got a spanking<< I guess someone was very sensitive about the joke for some reason. Well, kc hasn't removed it and she's about as straight as can be on Internet etiquette, so don't feel too bad. Generally this forum has been pretty tolerant of various professional styles and making light thereof. Aren't we supposed to be trying to relax now after the 15th? By the way, while I appreciate your texting acronym, may I say it has been used in other contexts that give it a connotation not consistent with the rest of your on-screen personality. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RitaB Posted April 30, 2010 Report Share Posted April 30, 2010 By the way, while I appreciate your texting acronym, may I say it has been used in other contexts that give it a connotation not consistent with the rest of your on-screen personality. LOL. LMAO. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Catherine Posted May 1, 2010 Report Share Posted May 1, 2010 LOL. LMAO. Or perhaps you are both ROTFLYAO. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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