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TAX HUMOR No problem is so big, or so complicated that can't be run away from. Charles M. Schulz in his Peanuts cartoon Love, sex and the I.R.S are three things that will always be with us. America: Innocent until proven guilty. IRS: Guilty until you spend yourself into the poor house trying to prove your innocence. I don't know whether this is a joke or a lament. Twenty years ago I was discussing the then mind numbing complexity of the Code with a KPMG partner. He wondered how he would be able to justify to St. Peter a life spent wading through the Internal Revenue Code. Think of how much worse it would have been for Jacob Marley had he been forced to carry around a copy of the Code and the Regs for eternity. Courtesy of Pete Wilson, Washington, DC CPA The real taxpayer rights: You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say (or we say you said) can and will be used against you in a court of law. You have the right to do exactly what we say or you will receive a visit from a godfather bearing a horse's head without the rest of the horse. Harold Harmon 6-13-09 Durant Daily Democrat Tax rates are based, not on gross income earned, but on adjusted gross income, computed by factoring in decades of special interest lobbying that change on an annual basis (you know, "sudden rate hikes"). Tim Higgins Toledo Free Press 5-15-09 If a person is an economic being and figures out the odds, then there is a very high incentive to cheat. That is, of course, putting aside honor, duty and patriotism. -- Jerome Kurtz, former Commissioner, IRS Whomever said that truth never hurts never had to fill out a Form 1040. Income taxes are voluntary! (If you like prison food) Teri Sforza, Orange County Register 2-18-10 The Washington Post - IRS stands for Internal Revenue Service, but after a frightening report from the IRS inspector general on the inability of the tax collection agency to protect taxpayer data, IRS might stand for Information Relinquishing Service. 4-15-07 ( Note: Nine years alter the problem has grown larger thanks to an improvident series of IRS budget cuts by Congress.) Two accountants are in a bank when armed robbers burst in. While several of the robbers take the money from the tellers, others line the customers up against a wall and proceed to take their wallets, watches, and other valuables. In the midst of the chaos, accountant No. 1 jams something in accountant No. 2's hand. Without looking down, accountant No. 2 whispers, "What is this?" to which accountant number one replies, "It's that $50 I owe you." The most successful tax lawyer in town had never made a contribution to the Red Cross. The chairman of the Red Cross, Mr. Wilson, called on the lawyer, hoping to convince him to make a donation. "You made over $600,000 last year but you haven't given anything back to the community. How do you reconcile that?" The lawyer sighed, leaned forward and said, "If you only knew... My mother is terminally ill; her medical bills far exceed her income. My brother is a disabled veteran, blind and in a wheelchair. My sister is raising three children alone since her husband died in an auto accident." Mr. Wilson offered his sympathy, admitting he had no idea there were so many demands on the lawyer's profits. The tax lawyer nodded and said, "Exactly...Why should I give to the Red Cross when I don't even give to my own family!" A man finds a magic lantern and rubs it three times. At once, a genie appears and says, "Master of the lamp, I will grant you three wishes. But, for every wish you make, I must give your tax lawyer double". The man ponders for a moment, then makes his first wish. "Genie, I wish to have a million dollars". The genie responds, "Your wish has been granted and your tax lawyer has received 2 million dollars". The man thinks for another moment, then says, "Genie, I wish to have a 50 foot sailing yacht". The genie responds, "Your wish has been granted and your tax lawyer has received a 100 foot sailing yacht". At this point, the man is somewhat perturbed about his tax lawyer getting twice as much as he so he thinks long and hard. After some time the man says, "Genie, I wish to be beaten half to death". An old, somewhat poor widow is in her estate planning lawyer's office and while searching around in her purse for her bifocals, she manages to drop a $100 bill on the floor. It sits there, unnoticed. Later, after the widow has left, the lawyer gets up, notices the money, realizes its source, and is confronted with a dilemma: should he keep the money all for himself, or should he split it with his partner? Copied from the OSEA Newsletter

Your day at the beach brought to you by their day at the beach...

One of my favorites: A fine is a tax for doing wrong. A tax is a fine for doing well.

When I took the test several years ago there was a guy next to me, not sure what exam he was taking, and every question was followed by a heavy sigh and pencil tapping. I finished, took the survey, said a prayer to the test gods, and pressed the key to grade the test. After what seemed like an eternity (but was probably about 20 seconds, it popped up that I had passed. I whispered "YES" and the sighing guy looked at me and muttered "A Hole".

Sorry, I used the wrong term! I fixed my post with a strikethrough of "automatic backup" and changed that to "auto-save".

The automatic backup works fine. The auto-save doesn't work for some people. It works fine for me but I choose not to use it. I think a lot of programs take up more and more hard drive space. It seems whenever larger drives become available, programmers take advantage of it.

Keep it going thru July 4th! HOPE THERE ISN'T ANYONE ON MY E-MAIL LIST THAT WON'T ....... KEEP THIS GOING. Let' s get this started ,NOW! So it will be out there on the fourth! I PLEDGE ALLEGIANCE TO THE FLAG, OF THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA , AND TO THE REPUBLIC, FOR WHICH IT STANDS, ONE NATION UNDER GOD, INDIVISIBLE, WITH LIBERTY AND JUSTICE FOR ALL! KEEP IT LIT!!KEEP IT LIT! For all of our other military personnel, where ever they may be. Please Support all of the troops defending our Country. And God Bless our Military Who are protecting our Country for our Freedom. Thanks to them, and their sacrifices, we can celebrate the 4th of July. We must never forget who gets the credit for the freedoms we have, Of which we should be eternally grateful. I watched the flag pass by one day. It fluttered in the breeze. A young Marine saluted it, And then he stood at ease. I looked at him in uniform; So young, so tall, so proud. With hair cut square and eyes alert, He'd stand out in any crowd. I thought how many men like him Had fallen through the years. How many died on foreign soil; How many mothers' tears? How many pilots' planes shot down? How many died at sea? How many foxholes were soldiers' graves? NO, FREEDOM ISN'T FREE ! I heard the sound of Taps one night, When everything was still. I listened to the bugler play And felt a sudden chill. I wondered just how many times That Taps had meant 'Amen.' When a flag had draped a coffin Of a brother or a friend. I thought of all the children, Of the mothers and the wives, Of fathers, sons and husbands With interrupted lives. I thought about a graveyard At the bottom of the sea. Of unmarked graves in Arlington . NO FREEDOM ISN'T FREE Enjoy Your Freedom And God Bless Our Troops. When you receive this, Please stop for a moment And say a prayer for our servicemen. Of all the gifts you could give a U.S. Soldier, prayer is the very best one. THANK YOU .........

And to you too my friend. I will be selling fireworks for my square dance club for part of the day tomorrow, and then coming home to bbq some ribs and blow up some fireworks. Wishing you all a great 4th of July holiday. Tom Newark, CA

You know, this is not a bad idea. I've had ProSeries PPR since the 2012 blowup and have kept it for my two complex returns that more than pay for the extra expense. I'm just a very cautious person, safety minded, and not willing to trust ATX 100% yet, there's still some problems, just ask Jack. As a side note, I just updated to 15.9 and my computer has been acting a little wacky since then.....not enough resources, and that little blue circle spinning on and on until I restart. I need to look away or it may hypnotize.

What about a hybrid transition plan? Keep Ultra-Tax on a pay pre return basis while making ATX your main program? It might cost a little more in the transition year, but at least you don't have all your eggs in one basket. You have Ultra Tax to fall back on if you run into trouble on a given return, and you have protection against any sort of meltdown (software or operational). I've always advocated multiple platforms for complex, busy offices for this very reason. But in a transition year I'd say it's a necessity. If I were considering ATX again (which I'm not now that I've discovered the superiority of Drake), I'd certainly want the absolute assurance I had a way out of the mess if I found it to be a mistake. At least my practice wouldn't be in danger. Another advantage might just be that Ultra Tax would find a way to make their pricing more acceptable to you once you tell them you're transitioning to another vendor.

How then can you make the statement that it works fine? I have documented evidence for multiple occasions when it DID NOT and DOES NOT function. This occurs on networked computers and standalone computers. Tech support has almost blacklisted me for calling in and complaining via e-mail so many times. For anyone that values their input time, click on the save icon regularly. If your time has no value, play the lottery with your input.

SaraEA, ATX should be able to handle everything you listed. Any program will have its downsides, and for ATX and for what you listed, you may have to input manually for the out-of-state credits to calculate unless you pay extra for their service to calculate the credits automatically. You've probably read about the others on this forum: that the automatic backup auto-save doesn't work; the program, its files, and its backups take up a lot of hard drive space; and the errors within the program that cause it to not start or to crash such as the inability for the program to connect to the program's internal server at times (not the internet server), and other unexpected errors that cause it to lock up and for the user to lose data. Of course, that's only what I've gathered from others' postings on here. I left ATX with the 2012 debacle. I agree with Abby and John. Demo the program, rework a few of your more complex returns from 2015 with it, and consider running concurrent programs.

I forgot to renew my EA card and I got a letter from IRS saying that my EA designation is being deactivated. As a condition of reinstatement, I have to prove that I have done 72 hours of EPE in the previous cycle. My problem is part of my CPE credit were for volunteering in the local VITA program and the VITA coordinator is saying that she has forward my CPE credit information to IRS. Is there a way for me to download this information from the tax practitioner page of IRS web site. Thanks for your help. Naveen Mohan

I got the same letter about a year ago. It is not that the providers fail to report the CPE hours for you, it is that the IRS looses them. I took my classes on line so I had all the certificates and they reinstated me after I sent them the certificates of completion. There must be a record that the coordinator can give you or something else to send to the IRS.

I think you get to it from the EA renewal page. (I'm on my way to Knott County, Kentucky, with Appalachia Service Project making homes warmer, safer, and drier.)

Yes, I do remember your telling us about this. This was probably a sizeable loss where the required casualty theft loss is so much more beneficial than a limited capital loss that the other preparer erroneously used. What a good feeling when the client calls in appreciation. Nice going, and kudos for the IRS, good to know there's somebody still there. We love good news!

I have clients that use Paychex and are happy. I've also used the People's United Bank payroll called Encore Online that is really Sage. And, for clients already on QuickBooks, the QB payroll has some advantages but keeps going up in price.

ATX will let you demo 2015. Download it and redo one of your complex returns. I think it will handle it quite well. I do a number of 1041s every year and it works great.

Sara: It probably can. I do some very complex returns. However, when I switched from Lacerte to ATX 13 years ago, I kept a number of the more complex returns in Lacerte for several years. ATX has come a long way since then. It will save you a bunch of cash as well. Rich

I was tempted to suggest fixing it by upgrading to Windows 10, just to see the reaction.

ok - I am piecing together info from her, and it sounds like JKLCPA you're right on the money. Apparently she was offered a rollover, and didn't know what that meant so just had them cut the check. thankfully, she had not cashed the check, and we might be able to send it back and have them do a direct. Sometimes half the job is the detective work...........

It might have been a requirement of the p/s plan to have the payout in the form of an annuity since this wasn't to a spouse. I agree with FDNY that it sounds like the annuity was already in place due to the father's retirement and your client chose to receive a lump sum. Client should check to see if the funds can be returns and if rollover is an option.

Considering that the beneficiary is under age 70 1/2 there are 3 options available (sounds like an IRA or qualified annuity due to the amount of tax withheld). 1. Open an inherited IRA, Life Expectancy method. 2. Open an inherited IRA, 5 year method. 3. Lump Sum distribution. It appears beneficiary took option 3. Local podunk financial manager may be thinking about a spousal beneficiary.