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The quiet of a Sunday afternoon was shattered when I receive a call from a longtime client, she knows I work everyday this time of the year. She sold a 4 family apartment building last May and received a 1099S for 1.05M. Basis left is about 68K, she never paid the estimated tax I calculated. After expenses, money went foolishly into buying a new personal residence and payoff of another family residence, all of it. The conversation begins with "I know you're conservative, but could you make this out so I pay no tax". I felt like I was talking to Max Bialystock (Zero Mostel), "you're an accountant, it's got count in it's name, move around a few decimal points". Of course I declined, so she said she will find someone else because she can get invoices for improvements, good luck on producing the cancelled checks. Was I ever relieved that I don't need to deal with this. Almost sorry I included the depreciation schedule in her package because I would love that call from her new accountant. Maybe it will be Leo Bloom (Gene Wilder) because he is going to need that blue blanket. Come to think of it, the final scene of the movie took place in a prison.

So, what exactly is the point of drinking water not filtered through coffee grounds? Water needs to be filtered. Don't you know all the disgusting things fish do in water?

Sadly, this is absolutely the truth. Same thing with the people we laughed at preparing their own returns. 99% will get away with the errors. Hey, I ate a vegetable yesterday, and drank eight glasses of water. Not filtered thru coffee grounds either. It will change your life. Carry on.

When I read the online articles in regards to the Affordable Care Act, I always look at the comments people post just to get a sense of what other folks are experiencing all around the country. The best one so far, they quoted the famous Nancy Pelosi statement about passing it before we could find out what's in it. A Doctor commented and I quote: That's what I would call a stool sample." EXACTLY.

The sad part about this is what Pacun mentioned, they will find someone to prepare the return and they may never get audited. That's the state the IRS is in these days and its unfortunate for all of us who do abide by a high level of ethics (ok, maybe I abide on a lower scale than the rest of you. ). More often than not, we hear of these types of returns being filed with no repercussions.

Talk about great government service - here it is already on April 4th and was only applied for on November 5th. Too, the old card only expired three days ago on 3-31-16 (sorta like getting one of those invoices with a due date several days before you receive it). But...no reason to complain - it's not like anybody's demanding to see it -- come to think of it, the only one who ever asked me what "EA" is was the guy who printed my business cards. Anyway, to offset my complaint, the mail also produced this postcard gem: Playboy offers a full-year subscription "for a token $12" or a dollar each. But I'm not jumping on the deal since that's about what I paid for the last one I ever bought. Besides, it's a bit late to be offering such to me now at age 76 (while Hefner is holding up surprisingly well at 80+, I attribute that to the 26 year-old company he keeps). Ironically, while dangling this low-rent offer, they also announced that, as of March 16th, babes-in-the-buff will no longer be featured. Oh well; I was never lucky at poker either. But, that aside, I KNEW I should have resisted clicking on that bikini-clad temptress Fox News sidebarred with an in-depth analysis of serious foreign policy goin's-on (Honest! It's all about the articles). "They", advertisers, (not the government-it wouldn't be worth their time) really ARE watching you. ____________________________________________________ Just because I'm paranoid doesn't mean they aren't after me. -- Anonymous

I can't wait till my daughter gets out of grad school and I'm not paying tuition and Nashville rent and I'm rich. I've got my hit list and waiting for that glorious day. Amen and amen and amen.

Chances are she will find someone who will prepare the return for her. She may go through one or two candidates before she figures out what she needs to tell them in order to get her desired result And chances are she will get away with it. But if she does get audited, it would not be pretty to be in the middle of this, even unknowingly. It is always smart to dig deeply when a new client shows up on the doorstep with a complicated situation and without a clear explanation for why they left the last preparer.

Me, too. I undercharge. We probably ALL undercharge.

Unless it's egregious enough to make headlines. Then we can break out the popcorn!

Well, Grace, why don't you just drop them? I have worked my ass off this tax season, and am now at the point that unless I like the person and the project, I am ready to let some clients go. Just go. My Dad always said, "Take your fist out of a bucket of water and guess what? There's no hole." I took that to mean that there will always be something or somebody to take their place. Next. I've made enough money this year, and have cleared out a few clients who just bogged me down in the past. I feel better for it.

Today: 1) Blah, blah, blah, (long @$$ story about a credit card), and will that hurt my credit score? 2) Mortgage lender: Do you know how much [our mutual client] will be paying for homeowner's insurance? 3) So, are you real busy? (New client, just now calling for appointment). I'm so glad I asked that last one who did her return last year. Jackson Hewitt. Cha-ching, thanks for calling, I'm never too busy for a new client.

TAX HUMOR They're only two people who ever have understood the Internal Revenue Code in its entirety. One is dead, and the other still is in therapy. As an EA I have learned and continue to learn that I do not know what I do not know and that buying technology to help me get there faster is akin to using speed dial to dial wrong numbers faster. Tax law is a funny thing. I think it fair to say that most CPAs know something about the federal income tax; many if not most lawyers do not. . . . I'm continually amazed at the attitude people have toward their tax refund. There seems to be in most people's minds -- and I'm talking about intelligent, educated people who understand the tax system -- a disconnect between the refund they get and the amount of taxes they pay. It's like a lottery. People want that check! In connection with the payment of taxes due, no person shall fear that he will suffer, at the hand of perverse and enraged judges, imprisonment, lashes of leaded whips, weights, or any other tortures devised by the arrogance of judges. Prisons are for criminals. . . . In accordance with this law, taxpayers shall proceed with security. -Emperor Constantine It is the small owner who offers the only really profitable and reliable material for taxation. . . . He is made for taxation. . . . He swarms; he is far more tied to his place and his calling than the big owner; he has less skill, and ingenuity as regards escape; and he still has a large supply of "ignorant patience of taxation." Feeling stressed out before your audit? Relax and enjoy this new stress relief method... Picture yourself near a stream. Birds are softly chirping in the crisp cool mountain air. Nothing can bother you here. No one knows this secret place. You are in total seclusion from that place called "the world." The soothing sound of a gentle waterfall fills the air with a cascade of serenity. The water is clear. You can easily make out the face of the person whose head you're holding under the water. Look. It's the IRS agent who caused you all this stress in the first place. What a pleasant surprise. You let them up...just for a quick breath...then ploop!...back under they go... You allow yourself as many deep breaths as you want. .. Gleim Accounting

We can only hope! I have a client who says his buddy's preparer writes off $800 a month for advertising expense for his buddy because his van has a business sign on it. If I knew he knew what he was talking about I'd be blowing a whistle, you betcha, and breaking out the popcorn, the "Jello shots," AND the "cough syrup".

It may be August for all of us soon, or never the way things are headed.

Not yet, but getting there.

Someday I just may find out as her brother and ex are also my clients. I'll report back in 3 years. I did warn her after our conversation to not commit tax fraud as she has a municipal job that could be in jeopardy if convicted. We'll see if she has a conscience. I'll have plenty of popcorn, homemade wine, Jello shots, and cough syrup at the ready as I don't think she heard me. Thank you everyone for confirming my decision to stay away. My description of this case isn't even the whole story. Building was gifted by her father to her before I took over 20 plus years ago. She unwisely over the years pillaged the building through mortgages and re finances not spending the money on the building (she does have an extensive shoe collection). I pride myself on keeping clients out of financial tangles, this is one of my greatest failures.

You are right, she will find someone and maybe they will never be audited. When I get new clients, and I see that the previous preparer deducted a lot of items. I ask "Did you get the refund from both places?" if they say yes, I tell them they are very lucky. I hope you are audited because if I were an auditor, I would audit your return and for sure you would get full refund. When they start telling, me "well I didn't tell my previous preparer to put all those expenses"... I tell them "yes but you go to those places because people tell you they give good refunds. About these crook places people say they will get you a big refund... they don't tell you these guys are very honest and you should come and have your taxes prepared. In any event, I don't know what you told the previous preparer last year and if I am not mistaken, you want me to prepare this year's return so let me work on that and I will tell you your situation for this year. For sure, it will not be like last year because I prepare taxes as accurate as possible and maybe you want to reconsider and go somewhere else" A lot of people ask for their paper and I wish them luck. I add before they live "If you ever want to the do your taxes correctly, we will be happy to prepare them for you". Some people come stay or come back a couple of years later.

Every year the Trust tax documents come in later and later.....There was 1 Trust and 1 brokerage account. Last year there was still 1 Trust, but now there is 2 brokerage accounts. Trustee decides that it would be easier if they separate the assets of the 2 beneficiaries under the trust. Making the trust tax preparation more complex. This year, he emails me the tax statement for 1 brokerage account. Besides being unreadable, I ask where is the other brokerage account? Oh, I gave that to XXXX, one of the beneficiaries, she's old enough now to be able to prepare their own return. Really? What's the registration and tax id on that tax form? The Trust. Good luck. And, the next time he asks me how much I'll be charging this year, I'm going to say, "not enough."

WOW

I have a classmate from my undergraduate days who not only made it through undergrad with no loans, but also med school. Even in those far off days, that was a feat. But she's been sitting pretty ever since.

I am in the third year of a mission to correct this untenable situation!!

Buy royal jelly, it cures everything!

Ah, that makes more sense. I live in the land of tax free shopping; it's on our Welcome signs so it must be true.

Yes, OMG, yes. It is so aggravating. I drive 15 miles one way thru that thing. People stroll across the highway likes it's a carnival on one little stretch there. I can't believe nobody has been killed. Accidentally. Not talking about my clients now.

no matter the dead line, they always just keep coming and Monday the phone calls will start and since I am the only one, guess what does not get answered and if they leave the message, just checking they will get a call when they are done, unless I need something from them I have moved the dead line back and back next year going to march 15th the only exception will be the clients that I can get there brokerage statements directly from my BD

And this reminds me of the attorneys who give out tax advice and have no idea what they are talking about. (Not all attorneys). Just had a client tell me that her daughter stole her husband's credit card many years ago and ran up a huge amount of debt. Daughter refused to pay so dad has been paying $500 a month for years. (Daughter had filed bankruptcy). They just paid off the debt in Dec. Their attorney told them that they should be able to take this on their tax return as a "hardship deduction". AGI of this couple is $163 K. Can anyone lead me in a different direction with a cite that would allow this deduction; which I have denied.

I could think of lots of pubs to go to about now

OR THE CALL Friday - yes you can drop off - and then he calls and the person gave tmi and said it would be an extension- my cut off is 3/10 mostly - well it is easy just us 2 - right?! - wouldn't be fair to those who have been here - got angry - yelled at her, slammed down the phone - so much for the PR from getting voted the best tax preparer in the area 3 years in a row,,, And actually looks like 3/1 this year - they got smart and all dropped off early!

Not much else infuriates my spirit like that comment from my clients. Not much else.

That's correct. If the person doesn't itemize, then those deductions can't be included on the 8960.

Catherine beat me to the explanation and even included video. Great book, and the movie was actually just as good. IMHO.

Inigo Montoya in "The Princess Bride" where Vizzini (the villain) keeps saying, "Inconceivable!" but everything he says is inconceivable is the next thing that happens. That word

Do you say that with an Inigo Montoya accent?

Well. Apparently, I misunderstood the original question. Crying.

Trying to prove a negative (no, you can't do that, they don't know what they're talking about) is my second biggest time hog and most frustrating one. The chatting with clients I actually enjoy.

I think that is what I need, these eyes are tired and there are two weeks to go

OMG. I would get whip-lash just trying to scan the screen. Looks like his neck is going to get a little stiff from looking at the screen through the lower half of his bi-focals. Well, anyway, it's good for a laugh.

I came to this board in 2013 but rarely posted as I thought I was busy enough on the official board keeping up. I have recently found something here that is different, still the same knowledge and expertise but an informality that addresses all the other nuances of this business we are all thinking, experiencing, and wondering, can we be alone? Not here, this is like therapy for tax professionals, helping each other, the comedy, and the best part, the nice people....priceless! Thanks, Bill

I don't strive to be the cheapest, I strive to be the best! Although, I am very often the cheapest...

"...the day on the calendar when a typical worker will have earned enough to meet their anticipated annual income tax obligations to federal, state and local governments." You all are funny. It's usually sometime in April. Rita, is that giant junk sale near you?! I'd die, or have nightmares about it.

This will not work. Remove all e-file documents. Then add the e-file documents back in. Fill in the information and it will file properly. I have dealt with over two dozen of these since Jan. 1. This is true for any returns 2013 & 2014.

Sadly we will never know the outcome

If they actually put tax cheats in jail, the entire company of Intuit would be there...

Yes, like the Eagles song says, "lunch will keep us alive."

Lunch? I have a new partnership that I thought was complete, uploaded K-1 for one partner and prepared 1040 for other and am waiting on his mileage. Now get an email from the gal that recommended them and her CPA asking for her K-1. They didn't tell me they added a partner; she wasn't on their 2014 return that I reviewed. I did ask about their relationship to her since she recommended them, and they talked about a side agreement where she paid some of their bills over time and they'll start to repay her during 2016 since money is starting to come in. No loan on the balance sheet; no 65K in their bank account; expenses aren't anyplace near that high. Does your LLC have a joint venture/LLC/partnership with her LLC? They say No but do say they have an agreement on paper and will bring it by Sunday afternoon. I didn't quote them nearly enough for more than a week's worth of work and asking for more information. While my continuing clients wait for me to finally get this one off my desk. Frustrated. At least I'll stop right now and move on to other clients until tomorrow afternoon when maybe I can see what I'm working with. These guys self-prepared their 1065 for the last couple of years, but put all their expenses on their Schedules Cs, including expenses dating back to 2011 that must've been start-up expenses! I did NOT offer to amend, just told them what they did wrong.

Easy on that. I have a high income couple with a 20K refund this year. I have not heard it is in examination, but I expect it to be (probably not, this is the IRS we are talking about). Here is why the large refund. Income over 200K every year for the last 7 or 8 years. 6 years ago, when the babies were old enough to go to school, they moved to another school district in the same area. Rented out their home because it was so under water from the Recession. With their high income, the passive losses on their rental were suspended every year. This year they sold. Not only a loss on the property, but also all those suspended passive losses released. Dropped their income down to a level where they actually got their child tax credits as well. That is how you generate a 20K refund in 1 year. And I am damn glad for them as well. They have been my clients since I started my practice 17 years ago. I remember when they got married, right after she graduated from college and started teaching. They worked hard, do everything right, get great jobs, and get screwed out of credits and deductions because they are successful. They could have walked from their mortgage when the recession hit, but they did not. Solid people doing the right thing. When I sent them the return, I got a 1 word reply "WOW". This is when I love my job. Tom Newark, CA

This is the best group therapy, thank you.

A CPA friend resolved this indicating I need use only one Form 8962. It worked perfectly.